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And Starring as Herself…Mrsrkfj

I aspire to inspire before I expire

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January 5, 2012

Blog Dare: Something Lost

January 5, 2012

What does this prompt mean?  I could be flippant and say my sanity, but those who know me know that’s been missing for quite some time.  My admission to my Maury Povitch addiction shows I lost a portion of my dignity.

Deeper introspection shows me that I lost my inhibitions.  No that doesn’t mean you’ll see me dancing with a lampshade in the center table, but I have lost the shyness and hesitation I once had when faced with uncomfortable situations. As an out and proud African American Republican, sometimes I am one of six people of color in a room full of people.  I have my elevator speech, know how to make interesting small talk, and I have volunteered the Teen for quite a few things that has her thismuch closer to her goal of interning at The White House.

I lost the need to be liked by everyone.  I remember I was the Yes Girl.  Despite scheduling conflicts, life conflicts, a need for sleep or even basic TLC, I would agree to be on committees, head a cause, and do things so I wouldn’t hurt feelings.  I knew I didn’t do those things well, but I was the go to person.  And burnt out.  Now I say no with freedom, I know that there will be days that the Teen will always think I exist to embarrass her, and not everyone realizes the charming chick I am.  I am fine with that.  I realize that I don’t like most of the people I was trying to impress.  That is freeing.

Keeping up with the Jones.  Since The Mister and I are both trying to transition from working for others to working for ourselves which means there are times when we play rock, paper, scissors with discretionary funds.  Since The kids and the cats own us, we sometimes sacrifice for their sakes.  It can be exhausting.  But it also makes us creative.  Coupons are used with abandon, Twitter contest followed and we appreciate the things we can do that are little to no money.  Not to say I don’t want an iPad, and I wouldn’t say no if Target has an HD TV at the right price, but I don’t feel like I need to hide that I shop at Sav-A-Lot and I love getting the bargain meat at Giant.  I lost the need to impress people with things.

Now if I can lose my taste for bacon and chocolate…

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Posted by admin 5 Comments
Filed Under: Goals, Personal Growth

Comments

  1. Imelda says

    January 6, 2012 at 2:06 pm

    I like your post. 🙂  
    I found your blog through Blog Dare. 🙂

    Reply
  2. mrsrkfj says

    January 6, 2012 at 12:51 am

    Welcome ALL! Thanks for the comment love and for visiting!

    Reply
  3. Autism Mom says

    January 6, 2012 at 12:12 am

    Thanks for stopping by my blog – I am now following yours! Great post! Look forward to reading more of the Blog Dare topics – fellow Bloggy Mom!
    Cheers,
    Jen
    The Antics of An Autism Mom

    Reply
  4. KentuckyGal says

    January 5, 2012 at 10:44 pm

    Visiting from Blog Dare. We just spent Christmas with my MIL and her husband in Texas. She was full of news about the rest of the family, including how much money everyone was making. Comparing myself to these relatives could have sent me into a deep holiday funk. But I, too, have lost the need to please everyone, and compare my worth by dollar signs, or youth, or where I shop. And anyway, every single one of them complained about not having enough. Rooting for your teen to get her White House internship!

    Reply
  5. Another BloggerMom says

    January 5, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    great post! love the end! I’m a new follower from bloggy moms

    Reply

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Meet Mrsrkfj

Mrsrkfj at gmail dot com Mail mrsrkfj@gmail.com
Mrsrkfj is the star of this blog, Government name Raya F. I’m an African American mom, wife, sister, Toastmaster, knitter, Immigrant Advocate, Republican. Click to Read More

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