The Teen has decided she wants to sell 2000 boxes of Girls Scout cookies. Which of course means that we have to operate cookie booths to make those numbers. Yesterday we were at the Fresh Grocer near Penn’s campus. Those college kids snapped those cookies up with an average three boxes per sale. They didn’t blink an eye when told the price and some even gave their change (one guy donated $13.00!) for donations.
The Teen with her wares
Buoyed by sales, we went back to the Fresh Grocer, this time in the ‘hood.
It was an experience, to say the least.
The Teen and I were first accosted by an AsalamalFakekim, who I dubbed Conspiracy Brother. He had every reason under the sun about how Girl Scout cookies emasculates men and that Boy Scouts should be selling cookies shaped like knives and knots. He refused to buy cookies on that principle saying that he was teaching his son to not buy cookies either. I suggested that he take his son to Boy Scouts and then he could make his suggestions. Of course he retorted that his son’s mother did not let him have contact with his son in a further effort to deny him parental rights. No, Bra, failure to have a steady J-O-B keeps you from your parental rights.
The Teen and I were rescued by Bootleg DVD Man(BDM). He had a lucrative hustle, selling movies…for fear that I may incriminate myself, I’ll stop there. Anywho, BDM said that Conspiracy Brother was the result of a failed socioeconomic system that systematically keeps brothers down.
He went on to say that lack of education and overall f*ckery contributes to spewed ignorance and paranoia.
BDM then explained that the sales of his movies were a felony and if caught with over 26, that was 2 years. Have a prior on your record, expect some REAL time. Then he slipped away. Someone had called the cops.
Combine these two with the kids asking “Carry your bags?”, the calls of “Taxi Hack!”along with “SockMan, Two fo Five!” and the Teen got a real lesson in what my childhood was like.
Pimpin’ Ain’t Easy
Despite the wind knocking over our boxes of cookies, it wasn’t a bad day. Everyone got their hustle on, except for the man caught stealing dog food. As one shopper remarked, “Dogs gotta eat, too!” The man was eventually let go with a warning that he was forever banned from the store.
The Teen has now sold 879 boxes of cookies. So far she has gained some confidence, increased her money skills, and learned perseverance. She’s also seen some true hustlers in action. Note: looking for a salesperson? Try the “hood. Game recognizes game.
And thanks to BDM, she has learned to look out for the cops.