Damn it’s cold!
The Teen’s school is pretty damn good!
As the marching band played, I felt that chill that comes from music. I could identify the different sounds from the drummers and feel the energy that pumped through the crowd. I wanted to be on the field. I wanted to be a part of the music. I wanted to be back in the band.
In highschool I was part of the band. I played the drums and I thought I was pretty good at it. So good that I planned to go to Florida and be a drummer/stand up comedian/ the first black female surfer ever.
Queenie told me I was crazy and “Hell no!”
So I did the things I was expected to do. I went to college, majored in boring business, and wrote bad poetry when I was feeling down.
Now at a crossroads, I watch The Teen and have mixed feelings. At thirty something something, I know the folly of not following the prescribed plan, of trying to do the “right” thing. I realize that part of the world ascribes to the idea of “What have you done for me lately?” That life can sometimes feel like this merry go round, spinning, spinning, spinning! with no clear idea when it will stop and we will get off.
But The Teen isn’t on that merry go round yet. She decided that she wanted to join The Color Guard and dammit she did, waking at six during the summer to hump it to school, making arrangements to catch a ride home. Heading over to the park to twirl her flag and perfect her routine.
The Teen harbors no idea that she’ll become Color Guard extraordinaire. She knows the time she spends with Color Guard, albeit challenging, is just fun. She has new friends, new experiences, new stories to talk about. From her time on The Color Guard, she’s learned to apply makeup, lost some weight, and has a focus that could only come from doing something she likes.
I don’t plan to join any Color Guard, but taking a cue from my child, plan to find my fun again. Go back to playing my drums, maybe not hit the stand up scene so much as find and follow the FUN again.
I spent thirty something something years doing what I had to do. Now I’m going to start doing what I WANT to do.
~ Posted on the fly by Mrsrkfj